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PastPoop7/27/2003-What the fuck are you looking at?You know what I'm sick of?DO YA!? Those friggin asshats who sell flowers in traffic. Thinkin' they're all smart cause the have a gawddamn captive audience! I just want to open my truck's door when I pass those assholes on the concrete island and slap em into oncomming traffic. I think my dog has fleas. About every half second he's scratching himself half retarded and wholly hairless. That, and he'll lick is ass for three hours straight. I work all day, and he gets to lick his ass! What the shit kind of justice is that!? Answer me damn j000000!!!! I want a day where I can lick my ass for three hours, and my dog goes to work! That would make an exelent post card. So a police officer came into the office today, and was asking me some seriously stupid questions. Me: Hi officer, can I help you? Officer: Yeah, do you get alot of people in here regularly? (Note: This is a storage facility, and some people run their bussinesses out of it) Me: Yes, a few people run their businesses out of here. Officer: Well, do some of them act supiciously? Like they are doing some illegal stuff? Me: Um, nope. At least not the people in here regularly. At that point I was thinking of the 'Domestic Dispute' I was privy to a month before. Officer: Do you have a *some name I can't remember* or a *another name I can't remember, GET OFF MY CASE!* that rents here? Me: *Checks computer* nope, sorry. Officer: Okay, thanks. So last thursday, around 2:00pm, I was thinking that a Scottish Pirate would be the hardest accent to pull off. I posed this question to HighPulp and he said that a Chinese Pirate would be harder. I beg to disagree. I Scottish Pirate is near impossible to pull off, as where a Chinese Pirate can be done with a ''HiiiiiiYaaa! Yarrr''. To drive this point home I put a dead rat under his mattress, he doesn't know about it, but I'm sure he will after he reads this article. I think the next world war will be started by the Oxygen network. Rosie O'Donnel is going to rally all of womanhood under the guise that all men are child molesters/woman beaters/rapists/toilet-seat-leaver-uppers and attack us during woman's kickboxing on ESPN. We men must prepare ourselves! We must Unite! Because pie isn't just for breakfast anymore! Because you can't have your bacon and burn it too! Because I we will not stand silently and pass on into the night! Damnit men, are we men, or are we mice!? I say take the pre-emptive route and stab Rosie in her fat lesbian ass, and then stretch her labia up over her head as a lesson. Bunnies are powered by hate. So now I get to reinstall Visual C++ .NET on my computer, because the stupid project creation doesn't work anymore. That stupid program is like 3 or 4 gigs of data, and it's a slow ass install. That makes my balls play tennis! Chicken Poop Pie. -BarnyardMessiah |
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